HEART AND SOUL MAGAZINE
Black Men and Vasectomies: Fatin Dantzler of Kindred Shares His Experience
It’s not easy building a marriage successful while working together as entertainers, yet Fatin and Aja Dantzler of Kindred the Family Soul have a love that only gets stronger. With a bond reminiscent of legendary show business couples like Ruby Dee and the late Ozzie Davis and Will and Jada Pinkett Smith, the Dantzlers passionately parent their six children. After their last baby, both declared there would not be a number seven and agreed Fatin would undergo a vasectomy.
The decision made the new season premiere of their reality show, “SIX is IT” quite controversial, as fans share in the every day lives of the family each week. HEART & SOUL caught up with Fatin to discuss his vasectomy, something black and Latino men are the last to get. He shares his experience, including that love-making became even more enjoyable after surgery.
HEARTANDSOUL.COM: Your decision has sparked a conversation on black men and fertility. Why did you choose to share your vasectomy experience on “Six is It”?
DANTZLER: The show is about real life. My wife and I showed the birth of our last child on “Six is It.” It’s about being real, honest and truthful with our viewers. I wanted to show people how the sixth child would be it. I wanted everyone to know our intention was not to have a seventh child and focus on the children we already have.
HEARTANDSOUL.COM: Take us through the day of the actual procedure.
DANTZLER: I woke up and even though I was assured things would go well, I still felt some apprehension about getting the vasectomy done. My wife didn’t accompany me due to scheduling conflicts. I drove myself to the hospital and the procedure took about 25 minutes in total. I felt the world was lifted from my shoulder when I was done. I was little sore after the procedure.
HEARTANDSOUL.COM: How long did it take for you to heal?
DANTZLER: I received a stitch or two. The whole healing process took about two weeks. It took seven to ten days before making love was possible. Also, I had a follow-up after my procedure was complete.
HEARTANDSOUL.COM: What would you say to a young father wanting to receive a vasectomy?
DANTZLER: A 20 year-old-father should think before receiving a vasectomy. I am a 36-year-old father with some experience that has prepared me to make the decision to have the procedure. I’ve been married for 12 years–all of my children are from the same lovely woman. I think it might be difficult for a 20-year-old to make this decision because of his lack of experiences. However, if they do decide to get one, down the line the procedure may be reversed.
HEARTANDSOUL.COM: Why do you think black and Latino men receive fewer vasectomies than white men?
DANTZLER: I believe it’s a fear factor involved with having your private areas dissected or analyzed. I think there might be a fear of something happening to our private parts. We are seen sometimes as sexual beings. Any thoughts of possibly not being able to perform sexually may prevent them from embracing vasectomies. I had another black man who received a vasectomy inform me of his process, which calmed my fears.
ADDITIONAL CLIPS NOT LISTED, AVAILABLE UPON REQUEST.
